If you can, discuss with your former partner how you will approach the divorce

Divorces are much quicker, cheaper and less destructive if both parties behave in a sensible, co-operative manner. It is not easy – and sometimes simply not possible to agree before you begin how you will both

approach the process. But remember: if you fall out and the divorce process becomes a prolonged and bitter battle, the onlyones who win will be the lawyers. If you have savings or equity in your home, these can quickly get eaten up in legal fees. Whatever the financial differences between you, you have one thing in common: you want to give as little of your money as you can to the lawyers.

 So if it is possible, it is sensible to discuss how you will approach the process with your ex-partner. Simple things like who petitions for the divorce and what grounds they use – infidelity, unreasonable behaviour, or separation – can cause major upset if they come as a shock. The more you have a clear idea about what you are going to do and what you can expect your ex to do, the easier it will be for you to control your case and keep your costs down